Sunday, March 29, 2015

Building A New Dream: Healing from Trauma

Life after trauma calls us to build a new dream on the foundations of the old, which have crumbled around us. This is where the going gets tough. The first steps are the hardest and require our willingness to put ourselves first; but new growth will sprout from the devastation and calm will follow the storm if we stay focused on our work. It takes ample encouragement to help in this rebuilding and it's encouragement I hope to offer. 

The following list is not exhaustive, nor do I claim that these ideas are new, scientifically validated, or right for everyone. Rather, these insights have been gleaned from my own and others' personal and professional healing work. Decide what you're willing to try. Reject the rest. Only you will know what's right for you.

Know that setbacks are to be expected. Be patient and find support for yourself when this happens. I enjoy offering my clients faith in their progress when they can't see it and together we take stock of how far they've come and assess the work left to be done. In time, you will be able to do this on your own. New dreams aren't built over night. 

Tools for Building a New Dream 

Share yourself with only people you can depend upon to help build you up. 

Know that loving yourself can be learned but takes time.

Understand that healing is a journey and not a destination. 

Have compassion and understanding for yourself.

Accept that lasting balance is never achieved but revisited.

Trust that you deserve the best, right now.

Let yourself off the hook for pleasing others.

Know in your heart that guilt serves no good purpose.

Believe that it's never too late to try new things.

Have faith that your body and mind know what to do.

Welcome every part of you, as it's here for a reason.

Begin to look for your heaven here on earth.

Find a creative outlet that speaks to you.

Heed your call to activism.

Listen to your needs (no more neglect).

Know that your healing is part of all of our collective healing.

Understand that changing your norm doesn't happen overnight.

Do what affirms and validates you.

Find and make your own family.

Learn to love the people you don't like and let go of their expectations.

Take it one situation at a time.

Your healing work may well be the hardest and most rewarding work of your life. Let your legacy be one you will look back on and smile. You may be standing on shambles, now, but your story is not over. Perhaps it's just beginning. All blessings to you.

No comments:

Post a Comment