Happiness is...

The question, what would I most love to offer? has been on my mind a lot, lately- along with the question, what is there a need for? My passion is helping women create the lives that we desire and I am especially drawn to working with women who are down and have been hurt. This drive comes from my own past and the past of other women I've known. Has there been a time when you've desperately wanted a roadmap to help you feel better? We all want to be happy healthy women, but sometimes the way before us gets murky. How? is a question I hear a lot in my office.

I would like to offer a recipe not only for making it through the day but for crafting a happier healthier life in the process. If this sounds appealing to you, know that these ingredients have been gathered with care. They have been a long time coming. Some of them difficult to grasp. This is no expert's recipe but one that I hope will continue growing more potent through the years. I share it with you, now, because life is short and messy, as you well know, and has a mind of its own. Life doesn't wait for perfection so why should we? Your first tip: you already know more than you think!

Happiness Is...
Knowing that you have a voice and a choice in how you use it.
Saying yes to people, places, and things, that nurture you.
Saying no to people, places, and things that hurt you.
Knowing that you can change your mind at any time.
Freedom from the highs and lows.
Relishing in a calm life.
Knowing who you are- inside and out.
Resisting the urge to follow downward spiraling thoughts.
Following what inspires you instead.
Being thankful for what you have.
Allowing yourself to be loved.
Allowing yourself to cry.
Stopping when something is no longer serving you.
Asking for help when you need it.
Knowing that you deserve love and happiness in abundance.
Sharing your light with others.
Being open to and inspired by life's little signs.
Knowing the signals your body is giving to you.
Responding time and again with kindness.
Celebrating the small things, which are really the big things.
Making something out of nothing.
Learning how to trust yourself.
Accepting the contradictions that are you.
Starting small when you feel overwhelmed.
Not a constant- but sadness isn't permanent either.
Being willing to take reasonable risks.
Understanding that change is often uncomfortable.
Knowing you can handle it and emerge stronger.
Paying attention to how you talk to yourself.
Telling yourself, "I will no longer throw myself under the bus!"
Telling yourself, "I love you and I'm proud of you."
Allowing yourself to be vulnerable in safe ways.
Knowing only good things remain when you let your guard down.
Taking the time to care for yourself by careful planning.
Not taking things personally.
Actively seeking out what makes you happy.
Making your healing the most important thing in your life.
Knowing each of us is on a healing journey.
Knowing you deserve your own time and attention.
Learning to stay with yourself when times are hard.
Learning to stay with yourself when times are good.
Appreciating instant gratification.
Taking the long view in life.
Knowing what's most important to you.
Living your life by putting your values into actions and words.
Forgiving yourself and who you need to forgive.
Accepting your imperfections.
Understanding that we all experience both the good and the bad in life.
Knowing in your heart that you can live a meaningful life.

Finally, add a generous heaping spoonful of doing whatever makes you laugh! This is hard work but you are the best possible person to do it! Be easy on yourself if things go awry. We've all been there. Thankfully, there are do-overs. This recipe isn't set in stone. You can always go back and change it- take something out that doesn't work for you or add something else in. Improvise! You are the head cook in your kitchen. I am rooting for each and every one of us and I wish you every possible success!